


Hat Effect

by replicasex



Series: Hat AUs [2]
Category: Hat Films - Fandom, Mass Effect - All Media Types, The Yogscast
Genre: Action/Adventure, Alternate Universe - Mass Effect Fusion, M/M, Science Fiction
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-24
Updated: 2018-01-28
Packaged: 2019-03-08 23:30:08
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,484
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13468893
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/replicasex/pseuds/replicasex
Summary: In the year 2148, explorers on Mars discovered the remains of an ancient spacefaring civilization. In the decades that followed, these mysterious artifacts revealed startling new technologies, enabling travel to the furthest stars. The basis for this incredible technology was a force that controlled the very fabric of space and time.They called it the greatest discovery in human history.The civilizations of the galaxy call it... HAT EFFECT





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I'm Commander Shepard and this is my favorite mashup on the Citadel.

“Approaching the LZ,” Craig said through their comlink. “Place is swarming with Reaper forces but no actual Reapers, thank fuck.” The shuttle jostled and shuddered as they approached their destination. “ETA 15 minutes.”

“Smooth flying as always Craig,” Smith said, smiling towards the cockpit.

“Same as always,” Craig responded coolly. “Wouldn't want you marines to hit your head – not much sense left to knock out.” Trott laughed and Smith shot him a wounded look. They were always wound up before a drop.

Smith shook his head and looked at Ross.

“Okay, Ross, run through the mission.” Smith said. He could see Ross roll his eyes through his visor but he did it anyway.

“Right, mates, it looks like we're going to be clearing out Reaper forces from an antiproton fuel refinery.” Ross said.

Both of his squadmates groaned. They were going to have to be very careful if they were to avoid blowing themselves up in an antimatter explosion.

Smith looked at his M-920 Cain and reverently stowed it before turning back towards Ross.

“Last intel we received was that the Alliance garrison there was holed up but stable. Might be of help or they might _need_ help. Communications cut out a few hours ago.”

“Which is why we're going in for a drop without any proper scouting,” Trott said, frowning. He was munching away on a high calorie protein bar, revving himself up for the all the biotics he'd use later on. Smith looked over at him.

“Where does all that food go, anyway?” He asked.

“It all goes to my big-dick implant, mate.” Trott replied placing his helmet back on his head.

“Gentlemen! There'll be time for Trott's everything post-mission, ok?” Ross said, trying to get them back on track.

“Will there? I don't remember agreeing to any of that!” Trott said, rubbing the armored plates of his gloves together.

“Sorry mate, it was part of the debriefing, remember? Reapers, fight, smash, get Trott naked.” Smith replied, hauling an arm over the shorter man's shoulders.

“Absolute children.” Ross said, mostly to himself. “It's the end of the galaxy and I'm fighting alongside horny children.”

Trott frowned.

“Wait, I don't think …” He started to say as Ross looked horrified.

“Shut it!” Ross said. He cleared his throat. “Anyway, it should be a fairly simple clean up. No Reapers in orbit and the last we heard the forces were limited to Cannibals and Husks.”

“If it were that simple why couldn't the garrison take care of it?” Smith asked. He looked troubled.

“No idea, that's what we're here for.” Ross replied, checking over his omni-tool.

“So, let me get this straight. We're about to assault a base filled with highly explosive fuel, facing an unknown number of hostiles to rescue a group of people who might not even be alive.” Trott said, starring out the small window of the shuttle.

“ETA 1 minute guys,” Craig said, the comlink crackling to life.

Smith checked over his weapons, and stretched his neck.

“Let's get to work.”

 


	2. Chapter 2

Craig sits them down on the open landing pad. The old Kodiak wasn't quiet and the thrusters made a racket while they landed. Still, Craig had set them down as quietly as possible in an out of the way landing pad.

  
“All right boys, move out.” Smith said. The drop shuttle's doors slid open and the three dropped heavily onto the metal landing pad. When they had cleared the shuttle the door slid back and the Kodiak prepared to hurl itself back into the sky.

  
“Good hunting boys,” Craig said through their comlink. “I'll fly CAP and see if I can't get some intel from above the refinery.”

  
“Thanks Craig. And same to you.” Ross said and waved him off.

  
As the shuttle rose into the air the three marines made their approach to the airlock.

  
“Trott, take point. Ross cover our rear ends with that big dick sniper rifle until we get those doors open.” Smith ordered.

  
“And what will you be doing, exactly?” Ross asked as he heaved out his M-98 Widow.

  
“Me?” Smith asked. He double checked his assault rifle. “Me, I'm shooting any fucking thing that tries to stop us.”

  
Trott and Smith double-timed it to the airlock doors. With a nod from Smith, Trott crouched down and started to inspect the control panel. A few moments later the warm orange glow of Trott's omni-tool was interrupted by a bright spark from the panel.

  
“Shit,” Trott said. “Thing's totally busted. Ross is going to have to get here and rewire the fucking thing.” He looked up at Smith.

  
“Right. Ross, break cover and get over here ASAP.” He switched comms for a moment. “Oi, Craig, can you keep an eyeball on our area for a moment? We need overwach while we're opening this airlock.”

  
“Can do. Nothing in the sky anyway.” Craig sounded disappointed. “Nothing'll move without you knowing it first.” 

Smith acknowledged and switched to the squad's comms.  
Ross bounded up to the control panel and crouched down. When he saw the state of the panel, he cursed softly under his breath. 

Smith let him at it for a few moments.

  
“Doable?” Smith asked.

  
“Definitely. Just give me a moment.” Ross said as he started splicing circuitry with his omni-tool.

  
“No struggle visible on the outside.” Trott observed. “Panel looks like it was blasted with an omni-tool, not bullets.”

  
“Trying to keep people out, or in?” Smith asked. “Or both?”

  
Trott grimaced.

  
“This is going to be one of those missions, isn't it?” Trott asked. Before Smith could answer Ross stood up.

  
“Ok, it should work now. They did a hell of a lot of damage to the panel but, as always, I managed to fix it.”

  
“Good job.” Smith said tightly. “Open it.”

  
The airlock door cycled open with a groan and they filed in. Ross examined the airlock controls with his omni-tool.

  
“Interior panels seem fine. Minimal power inside the facility though.” Ross looked up at the celling. “Which explains why the emergency lighting is on. This is going to be fun.”

  
“Ok boys, same as before. Trott on point and Ross covering our asses.” Smith nodded to Trott. “Open it.”

  
The interior door slid open with a hiss. Trott moved forward with his favorite pistol in his hand, wreathed in the pale blue light of a biotic barrier. No one was taking any chances.

  
When Ross cleared the doors the screaming protest of a high volume alarm staggered them all.

  
“I thought you said it was minimal power!” Smith screamed through the comms. Ross was already at the interior door controls, hands blurring as he tried to find the source of the alarm.

  
“It is! It's not coming from the building's systems!” Ross yelled.

  
Smith engaged his omni-tool and cranked his suit's sound filter to full. He wouldn't be able to hear anything through the filter but they couldn't operate with the noise at that volume.

  
“Sound filters,” Smith reminded them. “Go full if you have to. I did.”

  
The three experienced a brief moment of relief as the horrible wailing alarm faded. The only thing they could hear now was the sound of their breathing through the comlinks.

  
The facility was cavernous and poorly lit. They could still feel the vibrations of the alarms sounding throughout the refinery. Ross was bent over the door panel, trying to find the source of the alarm, or at least disable it. Ross did an awkward jig in his armor.

  
“Yes! Got the bastard,” He said, turning towards the others. “Had to disable the whole fucking PA system but I got it off at least. Kill the sound filters.”

  
“Right,” Smith said. “Let's proceed to -”

  
A massive rumble cut him off. Outside the main airlock doors they could hear a massive wall sliding down. Before they could move the thick blast door shuttered down in front of them.

  
“Shit, shit shit,” Ross said. “Shit guys, I think the panel was fucking boobytrapped.”

  
“No shit.” Smith said. “Right, Trott, I want a barrier over all of us ASAP while Ross looks at the panel.” He raised a hand as Trott's comm came to life. “I don't want to hear it. It won't be for long, anyway.”

  
They huddled together under the blue whorls of Trott's barrier. Ross didn't need more than a minute.

  
“Total lock down. I'd have to rebuild half the fucking thing to override it and I'm guessing we don't have that kind of time.” Ross said.

  
“Cool off,” Smith said to Trott as his barrier faded. He tried to contact Craig. “Craig? Craig?” Nothing but static. “Jammed,” He said to the others.

  
“All these traps, the fucking alarms – this doesn't sound like Reapers. They're not exactly subtle.” Trott said.

  
“Form up,” Smith ordered. “We're going to see exactly who thinks they can fuck with a trio of N7s and get away with it.” 


End file.
